Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts (1098)

RANDOM THOUGHTS: WESLEY SNIPES

One of those product-oriented TV channels features a program called “Wesley Snipes Uses Total Gym.” Snipes, now serving time for tax evasion, is apparently using the gym behind bars as he prepares for his latest movie “Snakes in a Cell”, in which Snipes replaces the original “Snakes” star, Samuel L. Jackson. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: COLLEGE CONFERENCE MATH.

big 10 logoWith the shifting memberships of college sports conferences, I believed it’s time to provide a clear description of the campus sports affiliations. First, there are 12 teams in the Big 10. That’s as opposed to the Big 12 which has 10 teams and could have nine with Texas A&M leaves in July, more or less depending on who comes and goes. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: THE COFFEE PARTY

There’s a new political group that calls itself the Coffee Party. It’s like the Tea Party but members have trouble falling asleep at night. ...The local coffee shop in my hometown sells lip balm and coffee soap. A friend asked me what I thought of the coffee soap. I said it wasn’t too good, but with a little more milk and sugar it would probably be tolerable. … I thought I’d try that new S&M exercise center. It’s called Fit to Be Tied. … Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: SPONGE BOB

Sponge Bob Square Paints drew criticism from a study that said it disrupted the attention of young viewers. It also drew flack for the square star’s $100-a-day Krabby patty habit. … The announcement before the Continental flight took off sounded more honest than usual: "We'd like to pretend you have a lot of choice in your air travel. But we know you don't." Read more...

AFTER HURRICANE IRENE

After Hurricane Irene, it was so wet around here I saw mosquitoes getting mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. It was so wet I saw a beaver dam with a sign saying, "No Mas." Then there are the jumbled piles of rubble and that's just my daughter's room. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: FOOL ME

Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice and I’ll probably be getting a lot of email solicitations from Nigeria asking my help in recovering hundreds of millions of dollars.  The New York area has received a ton of rain in the last two weeks. It’s so wet I saw a robin giving his worm mouth to mouth resuscitation. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; CONGRESS

Congress is ending its page program for teenagers. Comics around the national are expected to mount massive protests in the nation's capitol. On the political side, there is growing sentiment for keeping the pages and getting rid of Congress... I swear that Twitter is run by teenagers. I frequently get the following message: "The server understood the request but is refusing to fulfill it." Periodically, that's followed by a message "You don't understand me at all" and "Can you give me $20 and the keys to the car?" Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: GOLF-BALL

Golf-ball sized hail tore through part of Long Island this week. And in an even rare meteorological phenomenon, hail-sized golf balls were reported in Augusta, Ga. It could have been much worse. There had been predictions of golf-ball sized hair balls. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: HUGH HEFNER'S

Hugh HefnerHugh Hefner's new love interest says she has never seen Hef naked. It shows she has  some judgment.  He should have taken the hint when he asked her over the phone, "Do you want to know what I'm wearing?" "A complete body cast, I hope."

Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; TED DANSON

Ted Danson is going to be taking over the lead role in the television show,
"CSI." In an early episode, there's a reunion with the bar gang from "Cheers". The investigators discover Cliff has several bodies buried in his back yard. When Cliff starts with "Mom says" Ted reminds him that mom's mummified remains were found in the house. Read more...

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