… While we were in Cologne our guide pointed out the damage done by the various barbarian groups that left utter destruction in their path  the vandals, the Huns, the Tea Party. ... In Koblenz our guide noted the one of the world’s greatest lovers had stayed in the city, “You mean Bill Clinton?” I called out. … One of the charming towns on the Rhine is Rudesheim whose name comes from an old German word meaning major tourist trap. I believe the town’s motto is “Separating travelers from their money for generations.” … About every dessert in the Netherlands and Germany seems to be served with whipped cream. And if there is any people that can whip cream it’s the Germans “You vill become light and fluffy, understand?” …  … At a wine tasting in Alsace, I combined my wine was not very good. “You have to let it breathe” the proprietor said. “I think mine has COPD,” I replied.