Random Thoughts

Random Thoughts (1098)

RANDOM THOUGHTS: AFTER BP

After BP capped the well in the gulf of Mexico, apparently halting the flow of oil into the water, Americans waited breathlessly to see if Democrats have successfully capped vice president Joseph Biden's mouth. ... Much of the nation has been under a record heat wave this week. “How hot was it?” (Thank you class). It was so hot I saw a robin microwaving a warm to cool it office. It was so hot the possums in Indiana would only play dead on shaded roads. It was so hot a couple of Republican Congressmen said there might be something to global warming. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; MILLIONS

Millions of TV viewers have learned that the noisy vuvuzelas, the horns incessantly blaring at World Cup Soccer games, are a cure for irregularity. It's not a medically recommended practice. It's just something we've all thought about. Meanwhile, there's a new four-door version called the Volvozela, ready to hit the market. It gets less toots per mile. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: STREETS

Streets in much of old Amsterdam are named after the Canal they parallel and are easy to spot because they end in the word “gracht” for Canal. Our hotel was on the Prinsengracht (Prince’s Canal) a very nice area and the Rosegracht (Rose Canal). Then there’s the much less desirable Roetegracht (Root Canal). … Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: MISUNDERSTOOD

Misunderstood the guy who was complaining about the vuvuzelas at the World Cup. "Vuvuzela?" I said. "Didn't he pitch for the Dodgers?" Actually the state of Utah has added an option to hanging and firing squad for execution, death by vuvuzela. The annoying horns have set back the soccer in the United States by two years. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: THE BLOWN CALL

The blown call that cost Armando Galarraga a perfect game caused no much angst that motivational speaker Tony Robbins was seen in a bar sulking and endlessly that “Life isn’t worth living. …  After the U.S. once again killed the No. 3 leader of Al Qaeda, the terrorist organization has abolished the position. Leadership positions will now be numbered No. 2, 2a and 4.

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RANDOM THOUGHTS: ON A DAY

On a day like Memorial Day, I sometimes think of the countless people trapped in lives of incredible boredom and senseless repetition of actions and locked into meaningless rituals, with little hope for any improvement in their fate. But enough about professional baseball; the World Cup begins soon. So class, here's your first lesson in Spanish for the World Cup. Repeat after me, "goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal, goooooooooooooooooooooooooooal. ... Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; CHINA HAS BECOME

China has become such an important support for the Western economy that when it said it wasn't reviewing foreign exchange investments, the markets went up. In fact, when I looked at the newer dollars in my wallet, I noticed they had the imprint "Made in China." They also tested positive for lead ... BP has had trouble plugging the major oil leak in the Gulf of Mexico, butt has had much more success in designing a sea otter that is never low on oil. But on the bright side, the oil slicks are so lovely in the setting sun. ... Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS; CONTINENTAL AIRLINES

Continental Airlines served lunch on its flight from Newark to Denver, one of those piping hot meals in a sealed plastic bag. This one was called the Turkey Dog Crescent. I think it must be the first breaded product ever made by Goodyear … Combining the trend of sequels and summer movies, there's a new offering coming out this season called "X-Men, Summer Vacation." In a more light-hearted look at the mutant world, the film shows the gang raising some extra cash. Wolverine works as a meat slicer in a deli, Cyclops takes a job smelting iron and Storm goes to work performing simulations for the U.S. Weather Bureau. ... Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: WITH ITS CONCRETE DOME

With its concrete dome failing to stem the oil pouring into the Gulf of Mexico, BP has begun considering some other nontraditional solutions. These include using millions of pounds of Italian bread to soak up the oil and having most of the boys in Holland stuck their fingers into the hole. Read more...

RANDOM THOUGHTS: IN A MANHATTAN VISIT

In a Manhattan visit recently, I spotted a Turkish Restaurant, but its window had a notice that it had been closed by order of the Commissioner of Health and Mental Hygiene. Unfortunately, it wasn't stated if the food was unsanitary or was experiencing emotional issues. ... Read more...

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